"Easy Button" Goals
Hi Byte Wellness Fam!
How are you feeling? I’m excited for the Holiday season… SO excited.
I’m planning to spend lots of time with family. And, for the first time in a long while, I’m giving myself permission to lean into rest this season. It’s about time.
In the spirit of rest, we’ll take a hiatus from our #PhyteWellWednesday Workshop so we can all focus on family, friends (and food) on Thanksgiving Eve. Tune in November 29th for our next live workshop at 5pm PT, 7pm CT, 8pm ET. If you don’t usually get invites to these sessions, you can join the text thread by texting TEXT to 1(866)717-1919.
Click below to watch this week’s recording.
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Discussion Question
This week’s discussion question:
In order to supercharge your wellness going into 2024, what is the main wellness superpower you want to boost?
In this week’s #PhyteWellWednesday Workshop, we worked through a 2-step method for designing and adjusting health and wellness goals we can actually reach.
1) First, we used the MyTERMS worksheet to design a goal that we’re motivated to reach and accountable for.
2) Next, we used the SET framework to see how we can adjust our goals mid-effort if the goals seem hard to reach.
You don’t need me to review those two activities here. Just watch the recording when you have a chance to see how those activities went for us during the workshop.
But, what we do need to emphasize here is the single biggest takeaway (and the best kept secret) of goal-setting: Reachable goals are easy goals.
Hit That Easy Button
The idea that big old challenging audacious goals are not the most achievable might be counterintuitive, but it’s true. Still, the truth isn’t always easy to handle…especially when the truth contradicts everything we’ve been taught to believe about our role in the world as Black women.
This was the focus of our conversation from this past Wednesday (and so many other times).
How many times have we heard some version of the phrase: “you have to be 10 times better to get half as far” in life?
How much have we accepted this “fact” as both a reality of and a reinforcing tool of the systems of oppression that we live with everyday?
How many of us have responded by contorting ourselves into some kind of superhuman creature, simultaneously elevated to a life of uncanny over-achievement in conventional social metrics, and also doomed to perpetual under-support, under-nourishment, under-rest?
Someone wrote once: the notion of a Strong Black Woman is a ball-and-chain that weighs us down.
I’d think of it as an iron shield. Hold it temporarily, and it protects us in a swordfight. Hold it for too long, and its weight is exhausting, anchoring us to wherever we stand, keeping us from moving on to the next strategic battle position. When our shield keeps us from advancing, we need to let it go.
Superwomen Need Rest, Too
Being everything to everyone and overcoming the incredible odds stacked against us are things we tell ourselves we have do to build the lives and communities we believe we deserve.
But, we know deep down (and research shows) that we can’t sustain those heroic acts long-term. Eventually, we need to rest and re-charge. Otherwise, we won’t be much strength left to enjoy what we’ve had the privilege of building and the blessing to receive.
In order to reach our health and wellness goals, we need to forget most of what we learned about how to “succeed as Strong Black Women” in America. And, we need to press the easy button.
Just because we can do hard things, doesn’t mean we should always do them. When it comes to advancing our health and well-being, Easy is our superpower.
Does this resonate? Are you a proud Strong Black Woman or a recovering one? Let’s talk about it. Meanwhile…
Happy Healthy Living,
Dr. Wuse